saintcathyearnshaw:

deadbeat transmasc guy lounging around in a binder and smoking

calamity-unlocked:

were–ralph:

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Sometimes twitter be hitting

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This is even funnier with context attached

claralukika:

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今日は超てんちゃんの誕生日૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა ♡ Happy Birthday !!!!!!

blapis-blazuli:

crocodile-dandy:

I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife! That’s right, he took his hedgehog-fuckin’ quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was “this big,” and I said “that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you’ve got a small dick, It’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like! That’s right, baby, tall points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked my wife, so guess what, I’m gonna fuck the Earth! That’s right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not gonna piss on the Earth, I’m gonna go higher!! I’m pissing ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!

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Happy one year anniversary to the video that gave us this improvised gem.

Buying your cat a toy they really like is such a powerful feeling

napstawantstosleep:

napstawantstosleep:

Guys do u know that one meme where there’s a girl and like a bodyguard (???) ordering drinks and the waiter give them the wrong drinks so they switch them on the last panel,???????? BECAUSE I C1NT FING IT^

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I FUCKIBG GOT IT RAAAAAHHHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥

fishgirlautism:

fishgirlautism:

and that quirked up white boy… was your father

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scratch-meowt:

there are 2 Ethans in my daughter’s class. you’d think they’d go by Ethan L and Ethan M, but they decided together that they would like to be called Lethan and Methan and I think that’s fantastic

poisonousquinzel:

monkeymug:

vicariouslylivingx:

jadehariey:

durbikins:

oh yeah, with the new size limit for .gifs this thing can finally be posted

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what the fuck

I just….?

TREASURE THIS POST. IT ONLY APPEARS ON YOUR DASH ONCE IN A BLUE MOON I SWEAR

forget posting cringe to scare off Twitter folks, we just gotta make this appear to be the constant vibe here and we’ll be good skdjskksks

themetalvirus:

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ITS SHAPED LIKE A GUN.

greelin:

the way this video never ceases to make me genuinely lose my mind for some reason

soaringsparrows:

sskyeh:

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zackisontumblr:

stormesandshowers:

dadvans:

fuks:

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crying rn 🥹

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Dylan Sprouse really just went to someone’s island to sell his turnips??!?

dustsculptures:

jandjsalmon:

dulcetcrossing:

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This is so wholesome, he seems so nice!

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The follow up is adorable too. Sweet.

So you won that danimals sweepskate

floofe-trans-doggie:

yandere-angela:

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damn i wish my lucid dreaming had this feature

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I sent this to my boyfriend and he responded with this image I am DYING laughing here

thm